Sunday, October 14, 2012

Dirty Underwear

I have reached a new low as a mama.

Yesterday, I went to get the kids' soccer uniforms out and ready for them to change post-breakfast. To realize that they hadn't been washed since last weekend's game. Oops. Even worse, I also realized that G didn't have any clean underwear.

This would be no big deal for J. Wear dirty underwear? Okay! Wear no underwear? Even better!

But G is a different story. Whether it's personality or simply being a girl, I'm not sure. But she will NOT wear dirty clothes. And the thought of being without underwear would certainly cause drama.

So I intentionally misled my children.

While they were happily eating pancakes, I grabbed soccer shirts, shorts, and socks out of laundry hampers. I snagged a recent pair of underwear off the top of G's pile. I ran to the garage, and threw the whole bunch into the dryer, ran it for 2 minutes, and came back in with warm, fabric softener smelling clothes. (Except for the socks. Thank goodness they did not sniff the socks. There was clearly no way those things had been washed.)

J pointed out that his jersey was still stained. I 'admitted' to having forgotten to pre-treat it, and promised to do better this week.

They got dressed, oblivious to the fact that Mama is a liar and a failure as a domestic goddess.

But then I went another level down on the ladder of Mamahood.

I totally forgot all about it.

So this morning when G went to get dressed, she realized she had no clean underwear. Cue the epic meltdown.

Lying is a slippery slope, people.

I had to tell her that her laundry was almost done, and I would go get it out of the dryer momentarily.

And then I ran to the garage, grabbed a pair of her underwear from the pile on the floor of STILL unwashed clothes. (Hey - they were sorted and pre-treated. I had made some progress!) I threw the underwear into the dryer that was already running with a load of towels, and let them go for a couple minutes.

Then brought them in triumphantly, as fresh from the dryer panties. (Which is true. They were. Just not fresh from the washer AND dryer panties.)

I will note that I picked a different pair than yesterday's, so she didn't in fact wear one pair for three days.

I suck. But my kids are happy.

1 comment:

  1. Adia won't go commando and changes her underwear every morning and night. If Mira she decides she likes a certain pair of underwear, you will have to wrestle her out of them. She'll try to go days in the same pair. Kids are weird. Good thinking though Mama.